The lovely and brilliant Michelle Dionne Thompson‘s son is off on an adventure and she may or may not be crying in the parking lot.
Michelle reminds us of the importance of letting our kids be there own person and to cherish the moments we have with them NOW.
When I’m posting on social media, I often call my 15-year-old son “grumpalescent.”
And it’s not because he’s horrible. I’ve actually gotten off the adolescent hook. He does his homework without nagging. He can cook food for himself. He is always where he’s supposed to be. He makes sure my spouse and I are on our game with what he needs in school. He gets really good grades. He still plays the piano. He excels at track (yep, the medals and ribbons are all his!). I like his friends.
But he rarely speaks.
When he’s finished his homework, he plays video games. Loudly. And late.
I have to nag him to play the piano.
He generally doesn’t want to leave home. To do anything.
There’s no more snuggling close to my little. Because he’s not little. He’s about an inch shorter than me (I’m 5’10”). 😱
And then there are these moments where I must savor my time with him . . . he’s off to college in two years, but who’s counting.
His school goes on an annual ski trip and this is one of the best things for him. It happens between the two terms. They pack up a couple of buses and head to Stowe, Vermont.
He realized that he needed to pack. He quietly walked up to me and said “Mommy, could you help me pack?”
My answer, OF COURSE!!!! You want me to spend time with you? For ANY purpose? ABSOLUTELY!! We sorted out and found all of the things he needed for his trip. And then we got to the toiletries.
He didn’t like the Lush deodorant I gave to him, so I wrote down the deodorant he really likes. He needed toothpaste. He needed a travel toothbrush. And he asked me to go get it for him.
And I got it for him.
The following day, he asked me to bring him to school and drop him off for the trip. I dropped him off in front of the bus. The waterworks were trying to start. This is the fourth year we’ve done this and it’s still really hard to say goodbye to him. I told him I’m grabbing a hug. He reluctantly agreed.
I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself when he goes to college. I thought my heart was being ripped in half having him leave for a 3-day skiing trip.
AN ENTIRE SEMESTER?!?!
This year, we’re going to start looking at colleges. I’m going to show him what different kinds of schools look like. We’re not visiting Harvard (I don’t think . . . that’s up to him). We are going to look at schools that will have solid track programs. Perhaps he’ll look at business or economics programs.
That’s up to him. Because given what he’s done, he could probably go anywhere.
And I’d be totally fine with him attending a school right here in NYC, so I don’t have to sob when he leaves.
I’m not crying, you’re crying.
Michelle Dionne Thompson, Ph.D., JD is the Founder and CEO of Michelle Dionne Thompson Coaching and Consulting, a primarily coaching business that works with women in law and academia to set and meet aligned goals sanely in the midst of insane industries.
A recovering lawyer and a historian, she also teaches college and is writing her first book, Jamaica’s Accompong Maroons (1838 – 1905): Retooled Resistance for Continued Existence.
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