Preparing for the Fourth Trimester

My memories are usually of milk leaking everywhere, baby bodily fluids everywhere, feeling like I would never stop bleeding, cozy snuggles, isolation, helping the rest of my family connect with this new soul.  And constant nursing. And often the boredom that entails. And wondering when I will get to sleep again.

I rely on photos that are taken during that fourth trimester to really remember what life is like then, it tends to just become a wash for me.  Much like I forget most of the discomfort of being pregnant until I am pregnant again and then the memories come flooding back with each new sensation.

But this time the fourth trimester falls in the middle of winter here in Maine.  When we tend to be full of cabin fever and unsettled emotions anyway. Last year was exceptionally hard because we got snow early and often so by the time February rolled around it felt like it should be April and we still had a lot of Winter left. So I am really thinking about what my and my family’s mental health is going to be like.  

Here are some things I am doing to prepare for my Winter 4th trimester:

• Setting up a schedule and then inviting non-local friends to sign up for virtual coffee date calls on Zoom starting in January (even though she is not due until the 23rd) so I can talk to an adult even if it’s remotely.

• Asking local friends to be willing to pick me and the baby up to go drive to a coffee shop and just get out of the house.

• Making sure my hubby has all the supplies he needs to dry out, grind up, and put my placenta in pills, I know some people find this gross but we have done it before and it makes a huge difference in my postpartum period and helps keep my hormones from going too crazy.

• I already have postpartum vitamins.

• I am going to put up a shelf to look at while I am hanging out in bed for that first week and I am asking each of my daughters to add something pretty to it.

• I am filling my library with audiobooks which I am hoping will help with the nursing boredom.

• I am planning on listening to each of my kids read to me while cozening up with the baby.

• I love the idea of a 4th trimester Advent Calendar and have asked some friends for some new cozy wool socks and good chocolate instead of bottles and cute outfits

• I am going to make sure I have several boxes of mother’s milk tea and other favorite teas in the house as my girls are great at making me cups of tea in my silicone to-go cup.

• I will be cleaning up our room so it doesn’t feel cluttered and hopefully as peaceful as possible, I am working on it a little each day to keep from feeling overwhelmed.

• I am thinking about asking Hubby to put some shelves above the hope chest where we plan to change the little one (when not just doing it on the bed, because let’s face it we all get lazy) so we can keep spare clothes, diapers, etc up above and in vertical space.

• I will accept all offers of people to take my older kids anywhere and get them out of the house or come play with them.

• My mother will be here both before and after birth so she can help make sure the girls keep up on their chores and have an adult dedicated to them.

• I want to ask some dad friends to check in with Hubby periodically and see how he is doing, and possibly take him away from some brewery tours or something so he gets some adult time outside of work as well.

• Christmas cards are also going to be baby announcements/Valentine cards this year so I will have those addressed and an easy way to her details once she is here.

I am sure there are some things I am missing.  I am sure there are some things I don’t realize I need that I will.  

I am not too worried about meals and food as we have four capable people in the house who can cook and my mom is coming as well.  We have most of a pig in the freezer as well as chickens and we will have at least part of a turkey. Lots of squash and root veggies as well so that should all be good.  My 13 and 11 year olds are really good at taking directions on how to cook so even if I can’t get out of a chair and go to the kitchen, meals can still happen and get done.  I am sure some of my friends will bring us meals as well.

What would you put on your wish list if you were preparing for your fourth trimester?  What haven’t I thought of? What do you wish you had? Let me know as I still have time to add to mine 🙂