Two Things I’m Giving Moms Permission to Do

by | Mar 21, 2019 | Affirmations, Grounding, Mental Health, Parenting

 Have you ever felt like your needs don’t matter as mom? 

Megan Day, founder of Rooted & Vibrant is here to tell you that that’s normal and that it is possible to take back some control over your life with 2 basic, but not easy, skills.
When you take back control of your day to day activities, you increase your personal power and THAT can feel very liberating. 

I often hear mom’s saying that they feel overwhelmed. That there is not enough time in the day. That their house is a mess. That they don’t have time to cook healthy meals.

All human beings have a basic need for attention and power. Once our needs for food, shelter, love and safely are met, these are the next things we are concerned with. This is based on Adlerian psychology.

Have you ever felt like your needs don’t matter as mom? Like you are worrying about everyone else except yourself? Well, I’m here to tell you that that’s normal. I’m also here to tell you that it is possible to take back some control over your life with 2 basic, but not easy, skills. When you take back control of your day to day activities, you increase your personal power and THAT can feel very liberating.

 

  • The art of the NO

Why is NO such a loaded word? For me, I am a recovering people pleaser. I want to be seen as agreeable. If I really drill down, I think this stems from being an overweight pre-teen and just wanting to be the “nice” girl. I didn’t want any undue, negative attention, so I stayed quiet and agreeable. As I have matured and my self-confidence has improved I have come to recognize that this is not serving me.

Maybe you have a little people pleaser inside of you? How is that working for you? It can create overwhelm and unbalance. It can also create resentment.

 

  • Also the Art of the ASK

Asking for help. My gosh, is this difficult! When it comes to my family, I am full of pride and a bit of control freak. I recently took a parenting personality assessment that proved this. My sister and I are working through a program called Positive Parenting Solutions (more about this amazing program another day because that’s a blog post on its own). This program highlights the fact that any discipline issues you may be experiencing with your kids have two sides. You, as the parent, are 50% of the issue!

Argh! Did this hit home! I kind of already knew this but when I took the parenting personality assessment my results were staggering. I am a triple threat. I had a 3-way tie between controlling, people pleasing and superiority complex. My poor kids!

My point here is that I am a controlling parent who thinks she does things better than anyone else. Sorry! (Not sorry) This makes it challenging to ask for help. To admit that I want to do something but will need the grandparents to come and help watch the kids is hard. 

Even harder, is asking friends for help. For some reason, this takes a certain amount of vulnerability. I have gotten better at this in the past year, now that my youngest is over 2 and I’m not nursing, but trust me, it is still challenging. 

As a coach who works with ambitious and heart-centered moms, I see this internal struggle all the time between wanting to succeed in your career or business BUT also deeply desiring to be a connected parent. Finding that balance between both can be challenging. I call it the elusive quest for balance.

Together we work on developing a definition of what “success” means to you. Success means different things to different women.  Then we work on ways that you can be more successful by your own definition. Sometimes it is a mindset, illuminating your worth and uncovering your confidence. Other times, it is peeling back the layers of unrealistic expectations you have put on yourself or that you have unconsciously picked up from society. Either way, what happens is a blossoming. You take back control of your life and you step into your power as a woman and a mother. It’s a beautiful thing.

To help you take that first step in your journey, I’ve created a free online quiz for mamas. This quiz highlights what a piece of your self you may be missing. Finding ways to express that part of yourself can bring you back to who you are and what you really need to feel whole. Find the quiz HERE.   

Megan Day, MSc, CLC, is a Certified Life Coach, Meditation Instructor and the founder of Rooted & Vibrant. Her mission is to empower women to find their life’s work and to help ambitious moms create fulfilling lives.

In 2017, Megan made the decision to resign from her 10 year career in healthcare to start her own business and explore her calling. She values family, community, connection and adult conversation. She has found her life purpose in helping other moms find theirs.

Connect with Megan at www.instagram.com/rooted_and_vibrant and www.facebook.com/rootedandvibrant/.  

Illuminating and Unearthing YOU

by | Feb 14, 2019 | Affirmations, Grounding, Mental Health, Parenting, Self-Care, Spirituality

Andrea Parker, founder of Rejuvenation Grange, explains what an Illuminated Life is and how it she went from a withering single mom to being able to fuse her light, expertise, and passions.

Winter, for me over the last few years has been a time for visioning, for watering the seeds of desire and lovingly building the soil around them as they lay in a state of wait.

Then come spring when the snow melts and the sun warms the moist ground they can sprout. However, for the years before I sat in the never ending winter; I had let my desires sit dormant in an arid frozen tundra.

A decade ago I became a single mom when my daughter was 2. I through myself, due to fear, into full survival mode and placed my desires, my dreams of being a creative entrepreneur into a box and buried them so deep that I couldn’t feel their heartbeat calling me.

I did this because of self doubt from my divorce and because I had a misunderstanding with creative currency. My familial story lead me to believe that being creative meant that you wouldn’t make money. At that time, I was my daughter’s sole provider, until she was six. That meant, in my mind of limits, that nurturing my dream was not an option. I had to make a living to support my daughter which I decided subconsciously meant leaving all my desires behind.

So,

I stopped painting for me- I painted with my daughter but it was for her.

I stopped going on outdoor adventures to photograph and write because I didn’t want to ask for support so that I could.

I stopped finding the time to connect with my body and let it flourish through dance and movement except for the occasional dance party with my daughter in the kitchen or 10 minute yoga sessions that fit a young girls attention span.

I stopped allowing myself to explore and dream and create because I was so far down into the shadow, I couldn’t see the light.

As I denied my creativity,  my light dimmed to a flicker and it wasn’t until one day while brushing my teeth and looking at myself in the mirror, that I truly saw the withered sadness in my eyes, my furrowed brow and frown lines..

I didn’t recognize me in that reflection! In fact, a jolt ran through my body and in that moment I decided I had to reconnect to me or I would slowly die. A bit dramatic yes, but at that moment that was my truth.

I needed to rebuild the soil, reconnect with my desires, my passion and figure out how to make the space to do that.

I was done withering so I began my slow journey back to me.

My journey to what I call my Illuminated Life took a few years of saying yes to exploring my creativity again, of excavating my limiting beliefs around money and creativity, of asking for and investing in support so I could find the time to play for me, of trusting myself and being open to creating new loving relationships, and finally curating a business that fused my talent and my experience as a teacher together.

Illumination is the process of coming home to you, to revisit those forgotten desires, to reconnect and play with them and then to see where they lead you. As adults and especially as parents you get sucked into the whirlpool deferred desires, where you place the needs of children, the needs of your job, the needs of your partner or parents often get placed ahead of our own. This will suck the life out you and shroud you from the magic of playing with your passions, or creating deep connections to yourself and others, it will dim your light and wither your your joy if you don’t start making the time ( little bits at first) to do something that will illuminate you!

Through doing this work I was able to fuse my light, my expertise and my passions into my business where I now run workshops, retreats and programs that help others Illuminate their light and curate their sacred vision and passionate action plan.

If you are interested in illuminating you and want to be lead on that journey in a supportive, creative and sacred space join me on Saturday, March 9th from 10-2 virtually from the comfort of your home, or coffee shop, or office via Zoom.

You can learn more about the Illuminating Your Sacred Vision Virtual Retreat HERE. 

May You Shine On!

Hi, I am Andrea Parker, founder of The Rejuvenation Grange.

I am a Master educator, experiential business coach, and soulful facilitator. I am also a mom to a beautiful 12 year old.

I spent the first 12 years of my professional life teaching children through integrating curriculum with play and exploration. This joyful work gave me the skills of getting people where they are and helping them create playfully while facilitating their own transformation. This journey of playing my way to creating a business I loved has been an amazing journey and given me the space and time to:

Explore my creative visions.
Be present in my daughter’s life.
Create my unique daily and weekly rhythm and
Make a difference in the world and make a living doing all of this.

The Rejuvenation Grange was born from my sacred vision of making space for people to explore their playful nature and push themselves to their own fertile edge and create a joyful life and business.

I do this by guiding people to bring their Sacred Creative Vision to the world, design their entrepreneurial playground ( playful and grounded business processes) and coach them to create a vibrant work/life rhythm that feed their souls.

Intentional New Year’s

by | Jan 8, 2019 | Affirmations, Grounding, Journal Writing, Parenting, Self-Care, Tips and Techniques

Did you get any dreaming time during the holidays?

Did you get any time to process 2018 and think about what you might want to invite into 2019?

So we have made it to the first full week of the New Year. The kids are back in school, we are back to work and our life is suppose to just fall back into normal right?

Well it doesn’t usually feel that way for me. Besides the fact that we homeschool, and my hubby is back at work, the transition from the Winter Holidays into the let’s face it, the often disgusting next few months is a hard one.

We live in Maine, so there is snow coming, and this year we have had snow and cold weather since before Thanksgiving, so I don’t know about you but I am feel the end of February, beginning of March tiredness of winter, and we are still just getting ready for a lot more.

The house feels like it needs another deep cleaning even though I did one before the holidays, now that we have all spent over a week here, it feels like a lot of pick up needs to happen again, AND there are new things to put away and organize from gift giving.

So how do we do all this and not get depressed or feel put upon? How do we even begin to think about New Year’s Resolutions (and in my opinion the top of our lists as mothers should simply be GETTING MORE SLEEP – and to hell with anything else)? I mean are you even on board with packing lunches and resuming all the kid activities?

Did you get any dreaming time during the holidays?

Did you get any time to process 2018 and think about what you might want to invite into 2019?

Nope?

I mean we are mothers right, and unless you designed some time (and maybe even if you did) it didn’t happen and now here it is the 8th of January and what the hell?

So here is my invitation to you. Have your favorite drink. Coffee, tea, water, wine, beer I don’t care, but grab something that tastes good to drink and if you need to go lock yourself in the bathroom to do this I am certainly not one to judge!

But take a few moments to just breathe. Don’t do anything. Don’t rush or think about the next thing. And if you can’t keep your mind from racing then grab pen and paper or the note feature on your phone and just jot down everything going on in your brain until you can let it all go.

Now listen. Can you hear anything? If you are lucky enough to have silence, just soak it in. And if you can hear the kids watching TV in the next room that’s fine too.

Now if there is something you want to bring into 2019 it might make itself known now. And if it doesn’t then let’s just repeat this again tomorrow.

A few minutes alone. It can be in the bathroom or while taking a shower, or hiding in the car or pretending to still be asleep. But try and grab a few minutes every day and see what happens.

I think that’s a big enough resolution for us. What about you?

Chase Young is the founder of The Mommy Rebellion a place for judgment-free parenting.  She’s created a place to get tips, tools and support for what it is truly like to be a mother, stories from the trenches that show you you’re not alone.  Tips that real mothers use.  Tools to give to yourself and to your parenting friends to feel more focused, have more patience and energy, and feel less tired and snappy .  
You can follow Chase here on this blog, sign up for her newsletter here and follow her on Facebook and Instagram.

Empathic Mastery With Jennifer Moore

by | Nov 29, 2018 | Affirmations, Grounding, Parenting, Teenagers, Tips and Techniques, Truth-Telling

Jenn Moore of Modern Medicine Lady joins us today for a special video to help a dear friend overcome the pain and emotions around getting braces.

While not technically a mom herself, Jen has been a fairy godmother to many, including many members of the Mommy Rebellion.

As an Intuitive Mentor, EFT Trainer, and author of upcoming book Empathic Mastery, Jennifer Moore works with highly sensitive and empathic moms (and their kids) who get flooded with the thoughts, feelings, and energy of the world around them. Jen teaches them to manage their sensitivities and filter the emotional noise they absorb. Often told they’re overreacting or to “suck it up”, Jen supports women to recognize what’s actually theirs and what they can return to sender.
Instead of feeling overwhelmed and stuck, Jen helps women to feel safe, calm and confident so they can use their abilities to make a difference about what matters to them.

FMI visit http://modernmedicinelady.com

Crafting for Sanity

by | Aug 21, 2018 | Grounding, Parenting, Self-Care

I don’t know how you stay sane with your kids, but this is one of my ways….

I love to craft. It’s not something everyone does or understands, just like from the outside most people think that having four children is a handful. I think they call the terms maker these days, I like to make things with my hands for the pure joy of making something. Not just for the feel of making but I usually like the end result as well.

I grew up with makers, at least on the female side of my family, both of my grandmothers were always making some kind of handwork, as well as my mother and sometimes my aunts. I had to spend a lot of time in waiting rooms growing up because my brother was at therapy appointments and in those days before cell phones and tablets and everyone having the internet in their homes there wasn’t as much to do, especially since I didn’t enjoy reading until I was 11 or 12.

So I learned to craft. Starting with cross-stitch and plastic canvas and eventually learning crocheting, knitting, and sewing along the way making my first skirt at 10. This has continued throughout my life, including the 4 years I worked at a fabric store. I love to craft.

These days I am usually found sewing, (either hand or with my machine, we currently have four sewing machines in the house not counting the serger), knitting or crocheting. This remains my happy place and was the first place I had to find again after having kids.

I had to make time to craft again first as I came out of having all my little kids. I am sure I did things in and among having them, but I never really prioritized it. Now I do. There are a couple of things I need to do every day to stay sane, regardless of being a mother, or a wife, these are just basic to my way of seeing, experiencing and processing the world.

One of those things is making something, or rather working on whatever project currently calls me. And just like books I usually have more than one on the go. I am currently in the middle of knitting two sweaters, one is very simple and straightforward and the other one is complicated and so they both serve different needs and parts of my brain and time.

I also have several quilts and other sewing projects in process. Unfortunately, the power plug for my preferred sewing machine got separated from it during the move and I haven’t found it yet so it hasn’t been able to be taken to the shop to get tuned up and have its tension fixed. This is, of course, putting me under some tension and I will need to fix that soon. Being in a new house there are a lot of small sewing projects I want to do, like pot holders, curtains and the like.

I am super lucky that my husband is also a maker. He makes different kind of things like woodworking, brewing beer and painting tiny metal miniatures, but just like me, he needs to do these things to process and experience his world. Which means that we have a respect for each other’s work and are able to come to agreements on budget, and creating time for both of us to meet these needs. While I don’t always understand his craft and he doesn’t always understand mine, I respect that it needs to happen and needs the time and space for it to happen as well.

Crafting with kids can be hard. I don’t just mean crafting around kids, because we won’t talk about how many times my kids have caused me to drop stitches or gotten into what I was working on. Plus my crafts don’t tend to be done in a single sitting so they do have to have a place to exist while they are being worked on. Especially the handwork projects.

I mean that creating the space for kids to start crafting can be hard. I love taking my kids to programs where they get to do arts and crafts and I don’t have to do any of the setup or clean up. I love watching my kids explore their world through learning new things and playing with materials without any preconceived notions or thoughts that it has to be done or look a certain way.

That being said it is hard to have their craft supplies everywhere. It is hard to have to sweep up the glitter, the sequins, the scraps of paper from all over the house. Slime is currently banned from our house because of clean up issues. There was a while where I refused to make homemade play dough because of all the places I kept finding it.

I know it is important to share these things with my kids. And I do try. But it is also important for me to have my own stuff and for them to respect it. I am happy to help you learn how to embroider or do that thing, but please, please stay out of my yarn and fabric.

I mean unless you really, really want to see mom lose her shit in an epic way. You will stay out of my craft stuff. That and my books and you may live to adulthood 😉

Chase Young is the founder of The Mommy Rebellion a place for judgment-free parenting.  She’s created a place to get tips, tools and support for what it is truly like to be a mother, stories from the trenches that show you you’re not alone.  Tips that real mothers use.  Tools to give to yourself and to your parenting friends to feel more focused, have more patience and energy, and feel less tired and snappy .  
You can follow Chase here on this blog, sign up for her newsletter here and follow her on Facebook and Instagram.

Bombogenesis

by | Jan 4, 2018 | EFT, Grounding

My faery godmother Jen Moore of Modern Medicine Lady, explains the word of the day for today Bombogenesis as we prepare for another big snow storm and wind event here in Maine.  After weeks of cold weather and having the kids cooped up inside this feels like more than just the physical storm.  When can I throw my kids outside again?

 

While not technically a mom herself, Jen has been a fairy godmother to many, including some members of the Mommy Rebellion.
As creator of the Empathic Woman System and author of upcoming book the Empathic Woman, Jennifer Moore works with empathic moms (and their kids) who can become so open that they get flooded with the thoughts, feelings and energy of the world around them.
Sadly many have been told they’re overreacting while also struggling to distinguish what’s theirs and what’s everyone else’s’ stuff.
As someone who has struggled with these challenges herself, Jen helps other women to control their sensitivities and filter all the emotional noise they absorb to feel safe, calm and confident so they can use their abilities to make a difference about what matters to them.

FMI visit http://modernmedicinelady.com