The Silence of the Morning

Am I the only one who feels like this?  That if you don’t get up while everyone else is still sleeping you might never find the quiet again?

 

 

The silence of the morning
Before anyone gets up
When the day feels fresh and new
and your eyes are groggy still
The fuzziness of your brain
Is creeping round the corners
Of your mind
But the alarm has gone off
And as a mother
Of children
You know
If you don’t get up now
and enjoy
The silence of the morning
It might never
EVER
Happen
Again.

Chase Young is the founder of The Mommy Rebellion a place for judgment-free parenting.  She’s created a place to get tips, tools and support for what it is truly like to be a mother, stories from the trenches that show you you’re not alone.  Tips that real mothers use.  Tools to give to yourself and to your parenting friends to feel more focused, have more patience and energy, and feel less tired and snappy .  
You can follow Chase here on this blog, sign up for her newsletter here and follow her on Facebook and Instagram.

It’s about showing up

They say how you show up in one area of your life is how you show up in all of them.

 

Showing up with smiles on the first of several 12 hour flights.

Parenting is like writing this blog.

It’s about showing up.

Consistently, reliably, on time.

Whether I feel like it or not, whether my hair is having a good day or not.

Showing up, and putting out content, showing up and loving my daughters, in however they need that to look today.

Every single time.

Without the ability to see if what I am doing is really working, if it is failing, if anyone at all is listening.

But still, I show up.

On the good days, on the bad days, and most importantly on the mediocre days.  Those always seem the hardest.

Here I am.  Are you here?  Is there anyone out there?

Let me know in the comments below.  What does being part of the Mommy Rebellion mean to you?

What does showing up, no matter what look like in your life?

Chase Young is the founder of The Mommy Rebellion a place for judgment-free parenting.  She’s created a place to get tips, tools and support for what it is truly like to be a mother, stories from the trenches that show you you’re not alone.  Tips that real mothers use.  Tools to give to yourself and to your parenting friends to feel more focused, have more patience and energy, and feel less tired and snappy .  
You can follow Chase here on this blog, sign up for her newsletter here and follow her on Facebook and Instagram.

The Gifts of Healing

What gifts can breaking an ankle bring?

 

I broke my ankle on 6 August 2017 for the second time.  Different ankle, then the last time 17 years ago, but I still broke it.  And just like before, it still came out of nowhere.

The first time I broke my ankle I was 19 years old and taking my first real vacation from my first real corporate world job.  I was at a pumpkin festival with family swinging out on a rope swing and falling into a pit of packing foam.  I was doing it with an over 6foot tall guy and he wasn’t hitting bottom.  But of course, on the last time, I swung out, instead of swinging and landing on my back I managed to get a leg tucked under me and the only metaphor I can use to describe it was that it felt like someone had stepped on my ankle and compressed it like, when you step on an aluminum can.

That was a huge break, breaking both my tibia and fibula and needing surgery and a long recovery.  I still have a plate with 7 screws on the outside of that ankle and big long screw on the other side, and scars to show for it.  But I did eventually recover.

And there were gifts.  I read the first Harry Potter book in 24 hours and then proceeded to read the next two (all that were currently published at the time), I had the opportunity to “wake up” and realize that I did not want to stay working in the corporate world anymore and that I really wanted to go be a camp counselor or park ranger and have an adventurous life.  I left my job about six months after healing, got a job at my old Girl Scout Camp and then went to France with my Dad who was attending a conference, which in a long way around led to my visiting New Zealand and getting engaged.

So this August when I was hiking a local trail that my family and I have hiked many, many times before (including at least a half dozen times this year) while also with one of the neighbor kids, I was completely taken by surprise when I slipped on some wet rocks and fell, having first one ankle tuck under me and then hearing a loud pop from the other ankle.  I pretty much knew instantly that I broke it.  But there was getting down off the hiking trail that had to happen first.  Hiking boots saved the day.

This fracture has been much different from the first.  In part, because it is a stable fracture, the bone has stayed in alignment and so it has simply been a matter of providing support while my body works on healing the bone.  Did you know you can walk around on a healing bone?  My first broken ankle had required surgery and 6 weeks in a cast followed by 8 weeks in a walking boot.  So far I have skipped surgery, had an air cast for six weeks but was able to start walking without crutches about 3-4 weeks and am now spending six weeks in a lace-up brace that I can wear with or without my shoes on.

I know there are other gifts to have happened during this break.  I can’t see them all yet (hindsight truly is better for somethings) but I know the reorganizing of my fall has brought gifts with it.  One of which being that I no longer do the dishes or much to do with the laundry, that my older two girls have added that to their responsibilities.

As I heal more fully I expect to start to realize the other gifts have been given.  Healing comes in many forms and sometimes we have to break something first.

Chase Young is the founder of The Mommy Rebellion a place for judgment-free parenting.  She’s created a place to get tips, tools and support for what it is truly like to be a mother, stories from the trenches that show you you’re not alone.  Tips that real mothers use.  Tools to give to yourself and to your parenting friends to feel more focused, have more patience and energy, and feel less tired and snappy .  
You can follow Chase here on this blog, sign up for her newsletter here and follow her on Facebook and Instagram.

Driving

One of my little-known talents is that I have been writing poetry since I was probably about 11.  It’s something that has gotten me through super hard times, and yet has been something I have continued to push away as an adult.  I am working on re-embracing myself as a writer.  This was written 23 October 2015, but sums up life as a mother sometimes.  All we do is drive.

 

Driving
I’m always driving
Constantly
Stuck behind
This
Wheel
The road rarely
Changes
Only the stories
In our heads
And the words
Left unsaid
Driving
I’m always
Driving
Never
Arriving
Or leaving
Just driving
And if it’s about the
Journey
And not
The destination at the
End
Then what
The
Hell
Am I doing
Again?
Driving
Always
Driving
Without
End.

Chase Young is the founder of The Mommy Rebellion a place for judgment-free parenting.  She’s created a place to get tips, tools and support for what it is truly like to be a mother, stories from the trenches that show you you’re not alone.  Tips that real mothers use.  Tools to give to yourself and to your parenting friends to feel more focused, have more patience and energy, and feel less tired and snappy .  
You can follow Chase here on this blog, sign up for her newsletter here and follow her on Facebook and Instagram.

Visibility

What does it mean to be visible as a parent?  Am I ever going to be able to go to the bathroom alone or put my makeup on in silence?

 

Visibility.

It is something I think we all struggle with.  Because we are women because we are mothers because we live in a society that cares so much about what we look like.  We are immediately judged and are judging everyone on how we look.

It is written in our DNA, we are supposed to find the people who look like us so that we can be protected as babies.  So we can be cared for and nurtured.  So that we can belong and therefore be loved.

Yet if you have any small part of you that is an introvert, if you have ever told a secret in confidence and had that confidence spread like wildfire, then you have met up with issues around visibility.

It is not always safe to be visible, as women we inherently know this, even if we fight against it, we have been oppressed in so many different ways for so long, that we know this.  We know this. We have been oppressed in so many different ways for so long, that we know this.  We know this.

It isn’t always safe to be visible as moms.  I remember having my young daughters point out the truth of things.  My butt was getting big because I was pregnant and they told me about it repeatedly.

They watch my every move, all the time, from the moment they wake up until the moment they go to sleep and they have been doing this since the moment they were born, and they will always be doing this.  This was the burden I picked up when my first daughter was born.  This constant watching, and being the model for everything.  Because that is what our role is as mothers, there is no real getting around it.  We can deny it and pretend it doesn’t exist, but it is still there.

Because that is what our role is as mothers, there is no real getting around it.  We can deny it and pretend it doesn’t exist, but it is still there.

Lately, I have been noticing more gray hair.  It could just be that I inherited the early gray hair gene that runs in my maternal line.  Or maybe life has been stressful lately and this is the way my body is choosing to express it.  As a redhead, it is not as obvious as it would be if my hair was darker.

And so far my daughters haven’t commented on it.  But I wonder if my gray keeps coming if my youngest will remember me with red hair?  What gifts of visibility will I be handing off to her?

I constantly work with visibility in my business, in writing this weekly blog post and posting a weekly video on Facebook.  So far I am not going to lie and say it has gotten any easier.  What comes up each time changes, but easier.  Nope.

Being visible in the current world is not always easy or safe.

But the more we can be, the more we can shine our light in the darkness.  Which may help more women, daughters, mothers to shine their light as well.

How does visibility affect your parenting?

Chase Young is the founder of The Mommy Rebellion a place for judgment-free parenting.  She’s created a place to get tips, tools and support for what it is truly like to be a mother, stories from the trenches that show you you’re not alone.  Tips that real mothers use.  Tools to give to yourself and to your parenting friends to feel more focused, have more patience and energy, and feel less tired and snappy .  
You can follow Chase here on this blog, sign up for her newsletter here and follow her on Facebook and Instagram.